FEELING STUCK? ASK YOURSELF THESE 9 QUESTIONS

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​Most of us have goals that we are aiming for or that we want to achieve. However if you find that you are just spinning your wheels, not making any progress whatsoever, running against the same issues over and over and over again and trying to achieve the same goal for a long time, I want to ask if – hear me out! – you could be actually standing in your own way.
As a certified consulting hypnotist, I know that our brains are crazy and interesting things, and that we often can play dual roles of main character and archenemy in our lives.

I’d like to ask you a few questions. 

1. Have you desired the same thing for a long time now without getting it?

2. Do you tend to compare yourself constantly to others and repeatedly come to the conclusion that you are somehow a lower value than other people?

3. Do you tend to hyper focus on everything that is going wrong as opposed to everything that is going right?

4. Do you notice repeating patterns in your life where something often happens that prevents you from getting what you want?

5.Do you frequently procrastinate?

6.Do you often get distracted from doing things that will move you closer to what you want?

7. Do you believe that you would have what you want in your life if it weren't for other people, your family, your genetics, other outside people and other things?

8.When you want to try something new, are you prone to worrying or imagining the worst case scenario?

9.Do you struggle with life purpose or direction, even after spending time to determine that?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, especially three or more, it's most likely that you are kind of getting in your own way.
 
So how can this happen?

Well it all comes down to the two parts of your mind – the conscious and the unconscious. When you plan and strategize on what you want to do, you are using your conscious mind. Now, the closer you get to what you want, the farther away you are moving from what is familiar.

​Your unconscious mind, however, loves what is familiar, and will pull you back into it with unconscious actions. To the unconscious, better the devil you know than the devil you don’t.
 
Anytime you are trying to pull yourself out of your comfort zone, that part of your mind is likely to want to pull you back and stop your forward movement.
 
Though self-sabotaging behaviors can look different for everyone, some common ones include:

• Overthinking
• Procrastinating
• Feeling ill
• Getting into fights and creating/attracting drama

 
Feeling ill is a big one for me. It took me a while to get wise to what my mind likes to pull, but often when it is time for me to do something scary or uncomfortable to move myself forward, I may get a headache, feel a little lightheaded or “just need to lie down” for a while. I noticed that this would only happen in certain situations. I began to dialogue with my mind, thanking it for trying to keep me safe, but telling it firmly that I’m well, I choose to be well thank you very much, and it’s time to move into a better chapter.
In order to move past the point where you always get stuck, it’s important to recognize what unconscious fear-reactive behavior (AKA self-sabotage) looks like for you.
 
 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Kesha Dent is a certified hypnotist, certified RTT hypnotherapist, transformational coach and author of "Life Change Now: A 3-Step Guide to Manifesting What You Want Through the Magic of Being Who You Are". She helps professional adults to achieve life success, overcome anxiety, reignite their confidence and break out of their limitations to create a life of purpose, productivity and passion. You can find her at www.newworldcoaching.org  .